Final draft: allow time to pass

After the third draft, I left my novel alone for as long as I could bear. It was only about a month, but even that was a help. As time passes, the clearer your vision becomes and you feel detached enough to consider your final draft with a more critical eye.

I read this draft at snail’s pace, alert for any opportunity to make even the smallest improvement. I allowed myself a maximum of five pages a day, so I was never in danger of galloping through. It was tempting to speed up whenever I reached scenes I remembered being happy with, but in fact it was those sections which needed a closer look.

Sometimes, as a result of alterations made during previous drafts for the sake of clarity and continuity, you might find the occasional scene—however neat and precise—has fallen a little flat.

Here is an invented example of a scene which might seem fine, but in the polishing process has lost some emotional resonance:

‘Graham walks through the marsh, around the reed clumps edged with liquifying traces of snow, carelessly kicking an old can. When he reaches the harbour and the dredging beds, he remembers Dad taking him and Chrissie to the beach last summer.

Chrissie picked up some oyster shells and Dad said maybe the Romans had left them behind, because there was an ancient palace nearby. That convinced her she’d find all their buried treasure if she dug deep enough.

They couldn’t make her stop. Dad wished he’d never mentioned the bloody Romans. She filled her bucket with more oyster shells while the sun roasted their shoulders.

“They might not all be ancient, those shells,” Dad said, gathering up their towels. “Tourists will have left them, I expect.”

She ignored him. Even when the sky clouded over, the sand was still flying.

“You’ll not get deep enough with that,” Dad said in the end, prising the little plastic spade out of her hands. “You won’t find any real treasure. Not in a lifetime of digging.”

Graham kicks the can far out to sea. His best shoes and new black trousers are soaked through. They might dry out in time, if he walks slowly along the coast road to the church.’

I don’t feel Graham’s emotions deeply enough in this version, neither in the present day narrative, nor in his memories of the previous summer. So I added more detail to connect the past and present and suggest a deeper sense of loss:

‘Water flies up from Graham’s feet as he darts through the marsh, kicking a muddy aerosol can, dodging clumps of reeds. The sea has not crept up this far. Even at high tide, the marsh weakens the force of the waves slapping the sea walls and the sun has dissolved the last of the snow to trails of shattered frosting.

He passes a curlew feasting on mud snails. He skirts the deeper pools with their soft dash of fish and skim of heron wings, chasing the aerosol can all the way to the harbour and the old dredging beds where oysters are packed tight in the silt.

Last summer, Chrissie found oyster shells near the site of an ancient palace and their dad told her a family of Romans had sucked them empty two thousand years ago. After that, they couldn’t get her to come home. She thought she would find silver snake bands and laurel leaf crowns, bronze buckles baked into the sand.

By the evening, Dad’s shoulders were shining red. She was golden. Her bucket was jammed with the craggy old shells.

“Probably only your first two or three are actually Roman,” Dad said, touching his tender bald spot. “Day-trippers probably left the rest.”

He pointed out the day’s litter: a Tiger Tots packet, a Cresta bottle, a broken straw hat.

“No one lives long enough to dig deep enough to find real treasure,” he told her.

And with the unshakeable confidence of her seven and a half years, she said, “I will.”

Graham boots the can hard. Before he catches up with it, he drops to his knees, needing to unearth an unbroken shell, the kind Chrissie would want to take home, if she were with him now. He remembers her losing a perfect little crab-cast and how he searched for it, under every pebble, every scrap of seaweed, all the assorted rubbish.

Later, when the can has floated beyond the shallows and the waves are already nudging it out to sea, he is still crawling on the shore, peering between stones for something whole and intact, his dark trousers soaked and his black tie trailing.’

I think the second version is better, but could keep making revisions and never be sure. Editing is never really finished. You could pick up your ms a thousand times and find something to change, something to tinker with, something you used to love, but which now makes you wince (or vice versa). There is no optimal number of drafts you should write. No minimum, no maximum. Some authors write only one, others write thirty. It’s up to you. It may be different for every book you write. It’s a personal choice. Trust your own judgement.

The best advice I can give is never say, ‘That’ll do.’ It won’t be enough. You aren’t really satisfied. If you can bear to, put your draft away again and let time help you to see where improvements can be made. You will know when your novel is as perfect as you can make it.

On a different note, here is a tip which my husband discovered recently. I hope you find it as valuable as I do. I used to believe that when I copied something with Control C in Windows, it was immediately lost once I’d copied something else. However, if you use the Windows key with V, a clipboard appears with a chronological list of EVERYTHING you have copied. You can just scroll down and find the one you want.

Forgive me if you know about this already – but if not, you will be elated!

Bring back Susan, or listening to the third draft

If a robotic voice reads to you, there is no escaping the glitches which will still exist in this draft, no matter how much it was cleaned and tidied during the previous one. Any missed or repeated words, sentimental or graceless phrasing, they will all stand out.

For the third draft of Instructions for the Working Day, I listened to my entire novel, using the Read Aloud option in Word. This voice told me the truth. If I had read it out myself, I would have failed to notice all the sentences with bad rhythm, the dreary sections, the poorly expressed dialogue.

Whenever I heard a problem, I paused the voice and made the necessary corrections, sometimes readdressing the entire scene or chapter.

Here is an invented example of how the flaws might be picked up during this listening draft:

'John used to be a ballet-shoe maker. Now Susan was no longer at home, he thought often of the last on his old workbench, the flour paste, the triangles of burlap that built the toe-box, and the sense of belonging.

People used to light up when he mentioned his job. It seemed quaint, almost whimsical, to them, he supposed. He saw himself as an ordinary artisan, but it put them in mind of The Elves and the Shoemaker. They didn’t realise well-crafted shoes didn’t appear overnight.

John knew how the materials arched and stretched. He understood the unique degrees of flexibility the individual dancers needed. Yes, he talked to his satin and burlap, which probably was a bit fanciful, but each dancer had her own clear-cut requirements and every pair he made was hard, rugged work. Some dancers ordered more than twenty-five pairs at once and some of those would last for one single performance.

He had begun as a young boy in the despatch depot, graduating after years to the bench where he learnt to make soft toes long before he began to master the hard kind, finding his own rhythm step by step. Speed only developed with time. Flawlessness came first.

He never thought about Swans or Nutcrackers. He didn’t know one end of an arabesque from another and was impervious to the gush of compliments from the prima ballerinas. It was not, he was fond of saying, the shoe which created the pointe. Only the dancer could do that.'

• Some phrases here struck me as twee, awkward or even misleading—for example, ‘some of those’ in the third paragraph could refer to either the shoes or the dancers.

• A few words—'didn’t’/'dancers’/‘used to’—were repeated too soon.

• In the second paragraph, I objected to John saying that people ‘didn’t realise’. It made him seem condescending, which was not my intention for this character.

• After eliminating the most obvious problems, I rearranged the piece for a smoother flow, better rhythm and greater clarity.

• One of the most satisfying alterations I made was to add Susan again at the end. As her departure generated the memories of his old career, perhaps now we understand why:

'John used to be a ballet-shoe maker. People would light up when he mentioned his job. It reminded them of The Elves and the Shoemaker, how the well-crafted shoes appeared overnight.

Now Susan had left, he kept thinking about the wooden last on his worn workbench, the smooth flour paste, the triangles of burlap that built the toe-box, how he'd talk to the satin and hessian as he worked.

He had begun as a young boy in the despatch depot, eventually graduating to the bench, where he learnt to make soft toes long before mastering the hard kind. He gradually developed his own rhythm. Speed increased with time. Flawlessness came first. Over the years he learnt how the materials arched and stretched, understood the degree of flexibility each ballerina required. Many dancers ordered twenty or more pairs at once. When Susan took over the role of Giselle, her shoes lasted for a single performance.

John never thought about Swans or Nutcrackers and didn’t know one end of an arabesque from another. He was impervious to the gush of compliments from the prima ballerinas. It was not, he would tell them, the shoe which created the pointe. Only the dancer could do that.'

I think the revised piece is tighter and less rambling. It made me wish I were actually writing a novel about Susan and John, instead of making up their scenes as examples.

I didn’t rush through the listening stage with Instructions for the Working Day. I really lingered over this one. I felt closer to my novel then than at any other point. There was no part of the writing process I loved more than this third draft.

Change Susan, or approaches to the second draft

The cutting process that followed my first draft readthrough didn’t reduce the novel to a few pages, as I’d feared. In fact, my second draft grew, because I couldn’t snip out a chunk and leave things there. Often a new scene was needed, or at least an additional paragraph, to deliver the impact the cut section had lacked.

Sometimes I needed to increase the tension, alter the pace, escalate the plot or develop the characters—occasionally all of these—in a way the excised scenes had failed to do. And if nothing else, the new scene was necessary to soften any jagged edges the cut scene had left behind.

It can be disconcerting to make a cut or a change which generates a knock-on effect for later sections of your novel. But never be afraid to alter or delete a scene on page 32 which subsequently disturbs a passage on page 109. Because when you rejig page 109, you might produce a brilliant scene which wouldn’t have existed without all your astute modifications and excisions. And it will emerge as the result of a new, improved knowledge and understanding of your novel.

Here's an invented example:

Page 32, first draft: ‘When Susan moved back into Richard’s house, he said they should take it one day at a time. She wasn’t sure how else it could be taken. How did other people ‘take it’? She felt as if she were on probation, but said nothing. She agreed that she shouldn’t unpack. He made space for her suitcase in a cupboard on the landing and she went there every morning to fetch her toothbrush and select her clothes for the day. At night she went back there to put her washing in a plastic bag. She didn’t touch his coffee grinder, his dimmer switches, his remote control. She waited patiently for the day her suitcase would emerge and her belongings would actually belong.’

During my initial readthrough, I might decide that Susan needs to be a less passive character:

Page 32, second draft: ‘When Susan moved back into Richard’s house, she insisted on unpacking. 'One day at a time’ shouldn’t curtail access to everyday essentials. Even so, she didn’t allow her possessions to encroach on his: her hairbrush lived on the corner of the chest-of-drawers, not beside his, in case the bristles might touch. Likewise her toothbrush, the head angled away from his in the mug on the bathroom sill. She bought a jute drawstring bag for her laundry, rather than use the flimsy carrier he’d provided. She kept most of her books on the shelf he had cleared for her, but had to wedge her Muriel Sparks on top of his Proust. Her economy tub of hand cream didn’t fit in the bathroom cabinet and was not allowed to sit on the corner of the bath. It had to stay in her suitcase. Not a defeat, but a single compromise.’

After making these changes, I would check all Susan’s scenes to ensure she was a little more active and spirited.

For example:

Page 109, first draft: ‘When she moved out, it didn’t take Susan long to pack. It took her no time at all. Only her hairbrush and pyjamas had eventually emerged on a permanent basis. The pyjamas would smell of this house. Last night she had extracted hair from his brush and wound it through her own. She thought about throwing them in his bin. In the end, she packed them. She might not want the memories, but maybe she needed the reminders.’

Page 109, second draft: ‘When she moved out, Susan packed her suitcase, then immediately unpacked it. She pushed her hairbrush and Richard’s together, interlocking the bristles—likewise their toothbrushes—and left them cradled in his washbasin. She inserted her books between his. She liberated her gigantic tub of hand cream and put it on his bedside table with the lid off. She left her clothes strewn under his bed. All she packed was his remote control. It would be of no use to her, and no use to him. Not a memory, but a reminder.’

I’m not suggesting these are good scenes, nor that the second drafts have improved them, but they are examples of how straightforward it can be to make alterations in small sections, taking account of other scenes which will need modifying as a result.

The best tip I can give for maintaining control of this modification process is to flag all the necessary changes in your novel plan first, rather than diving straight into the manuscript. I will talk about how I made my plan in a later post, but it might be helpful to mention here that when I was at the first draft stage, I made a note on the plan whenever I deviated from it. This meant I had an accurate summary of all the action and character development. When it was time to make cuts and alterations, I could see at a glance which sections, both earlier and later, those changes would affect. I highlighted them in the plan, then used this a reference guide to ensure no scenes were missed.